Favorite Ocean

i once found my ocean.
it was beautiful
but i drowned in it.

i came back to the surface
perfect island
it was always the place where i belong
then and now
but it is surrounded by oceans
i find another ocean as i walk through this island

now, i'm on the edge of this island
i want to run to the different ocean once again
fresh but also deep
unfortunately, it pushes me
at the same time, the land doesn't pull me
i choose to stay here, neither ocean nor land

will i drown again?